Learning the underpinnings of sibling estrangement is a multi-factored experience. It can require us to learn more about the psychology of defense mechanisms, biases, and attachment styles, just to name a few. Another important factor to consider is the emotional maturity of parents. In this article, we’ll explore the ideas of Lindsay C. Gibson’s bookContinue reading “Emotionally Immature Parents and Sibling Estrangement”
Tag Archives: #boundaries
Mature Defense Mechanisms and Sibling Estrangement
In my last article, I talked about ego defense mechanisms, and how these can play out with siblings that exhibit these primitive and neurotic strategies. As we’ve seen, these are unhealthy expressions of the ego, which leave us hurt or bewildered. Here, we’ll be looking at what mature defense mechanisms can look like, and howContinue reading “Mature Defense Mechanisms and Sibling Estrangement”
Breaking the Cycle of Self-Erasing in Sibling Relationships
Sibling estrangement brings with it different challenges and adversities. Some of these force us to adapt, grow, and become better versions of ourselves, amidst the experiences that come with either being estranged or in having to take a step back. But what if meeting the challenge involves becoming blind to ourselves? In this article, weContinue reading “Breaking the Cycle of Self-Erasing in Sibling Relationships”
Stopping Intergenerational Estrangement: Key Strategies
Every now and then, the question arises within our online support group with just how we can stop intergenerational estrangement. This is a perplexing question for a number of us, as we are highly conscious of what the effects of estrangement are, and don’t want them to be perpetuated to the next generation. It’s concerningContinue reading “Stopping Intergenerational Estrangement: Key Strategies”
The “Almost” Sibling Relationship
Estrangement happens in degrees. Contrary to what some people may think, it’s more than about simply being estranged or not. It can be wildly confusing when you may still be talking with your sibling, yet feel there is something missing. Perhaps it’s certain subjects that are off limits, or an emotional depth that you somehowContinue reading “The “Almost” Sibling Relationship”
Understanding Sibling Estrangement: Recognizing Biases
Without realizing it, we can be subject to biases, through mental shortcuts and distorted thinking. This cannot be more true with sibling estrangement. It may well be that past interactions with us caused a brother or sister to unjustly add blame to justify their feelings or actions. Biases can color perceptions, and make it harderContinue reading “Understanding Sibling Estrangement: Recognizing Biases”
Grieving the Sibling We Never Had
Every now and then, people in our community experience an overwhelming sense of sadness with their sibling estrangement, which is normal. And yet, another type of hardship can emerge, which is the realization of what we don’t have. Some people may quickly conclude that they shouldn’t be sad for the sibling they never had, andContinue reading “Grieving the Sibling We Never Had”
To send a Birthday Card or Not?
One particular question that comes up often in our online community is whether it’s the right behavior or not to send a birthday card to our sibling. While this can be a deceptively simple question to answer when there is no estrangement happening in your life with a particular family member, it can be aContinue reading “To send a Birthday Card or Not?”
The Wisdom in being Estrangement-Informed
When it comes to being trauma-informed, certain key principles arise with respect to safety, trustworthiness, freedom to choose, mutuality, empowerment and cultural consideration. These are all important elements to ensure the well-being of individuals facing trauma. Just as with trauma, estrangement can appear invisible, until it is openly shared and spoken about. What would anContinue reading “The Wisdom in being Estrangement-Informed”
The Inner Child and Sibling Estrangement
Our experience with sibling estrangement can leave a lasting mark on our lives. Being in an estrangement-prone family, we can be left with the experience of fear, hurt, misunderstanding, hostility, avoidance, or rigidity within us. These reactions can cause us to become something we are not, and play themselves out in unhealthy ways that driveContinue reading “The Inner Child and Sibling Estrangement”
Sibling Estrangement 