Estrangement happens in degrees. Contrary to what some people may think, it’s more than about simply being estranged or not. It can be wildly confusing when you may still be talking with your sibling, yet feel there is something missing. Perhaps it’s certain subjects that are off limits, or an emotional depth that you somehowContinue reading “The “Almost” Sibling Relationship”
Tag Archives: #boundaries
Understanding Sibling Estrangement: Recognizing Biases
Without realizing it, we can be subject to biases, through mental shortcuts and distorted thinking. This cannot be more true with sibling estrangement. It may well be that past interactions with us caused a brother or sister to unjustly add blame to justify their feelings or actions. Biases can color perceptions, and make it harderContinue reading “Understanding Sibling Estrangement: Recognizing Biases”
Grieving the Sibling We Never Had
Every now and then, people in our community experience an overwhelming sense of sadness with their sibling estrangement, which is normal. And yet, another type of hardship can emerge, which is the realization of what we don’t have. Some people may quickly conclude that they shouldn’t be sad for the sibling they never had, andContinue reading “Grieving the Sibling We Never Had”
To send a Birthday Card or Not?
One particular question that comes up often in our online community is whether it’s the right behavior or not to send a birthday card to our sibling. While this can be a deceptively simple question to answer when there is no estrangement happening in your life with a particular family member, it can be aContinue reading “To send a Birthday Card or Not?”
The Wisdom in being Estrangement-Informed
When it comes to being trauma-informed, certain key principles arise with respect to safety, trustworthiness, freedom to choose, mutuality, empowerment and cultural consideration. These are all important elements to ensure the well-being of individuals facing trauma. Just as with trauma, estrangement can appear invisible, until it is openly shared and spoken about. What would anContinue reading “The Wisdom in being Estrangement-Informed”
The Inner Child and Sibling Estrangement
Our experience with sibling estrangement can leave a lasting mark on our lives. Being in an estrangement-prone family, we can be left with the experience of fear, hurt, misunderstanding, hostility, avoidance, or rigidity within us. These reactions can cause us to become something we are not, and play themselves out in unhealthy ways that driveContinue reading “The Inner Child and Sibling Estrangement”
Detachment and Non-Doing with Sibling Estrangement
Every so often in the support group that I host, it’s mentioned that after we experience sibling estrangement, we become more aware of the relationships around us whenever we experience further rejection or estrangement. Maybe it’s happened that you’ve experienced another compounding loss in your life, be it from a friend, another family member, orContinue reading “Detachment and Non-Doing with Sibling Estrangement”
Welcoming Vulnerability in Sibling Estrangement
A few weeks before my sister’s wedding day some years ago, I had been pressed to confirm my presence at her event. I had mentioned to her that I would indeed be present, despite that it cut into a course I was taking at the time several hours away. On the day of the event,Continue reading “Welcoming Vulnerability in Sibling Estrangement”
Self-Fulfilling Prophecy and Sibling Estrangement
In a former job, where I used to work as a substance abuse counselor, there would be a concept that I would bring up with regard to certain behaviors that would be predictive with some clients. It had to do with the idea that if an initial problem was not taken care of and keptContinue reading “Self-Fulfilling Prophecy and Sibling Estrangement”
The Benefits of Curiosity with Sibling Estrangement
A few years ago, Back when my sister and I were talking more, I phoned her just to see how she was doing. I was immediately met with the assumption that I was phoning because I was bored, and that she didn’t want to be used to relieve my boredom. I was left flabbergasted, asContinue reading “The Benefits of Curiosity with Sibling Estrangement”